I woke up this morning in pain. I woke up yesterday in pain. Between a stomach bug/acid reflux and a terrible migraine in these past couple of days, I am exhausted. I was under so much stress a couple of weeks ago that my milk supply (I breastfeed) dropped dramatically. To be real, I didn’t even realize what was going on when I stopped pumping my typical amount of milk. Someone else pointed out how stress effects milk supply and then the lightbulb in my head went off. I have got to learn to slow down because my body is doing the job for me.
People who believe may seem like we have it all together. We may claim joy and peace and all of these “good emotions”, and trust me, most of us truly feel that way. I feel every word I type on this blog. But while we do feel those good things and we love God, we still have to be real with ourselves and God. I did allow my circumstances to get me down. Maybe not emotionally or in an obvious way. But my body was physically telling me to relax, release, and find my peace. I need to re-center myself. This isn’t a cry for help or anything. I’m really okay. And I know I’m surrounded by the help I need whenever I need it. But I promised to be honest to myself and y’all in this journey. To show what life is really like for a believer and to show that while life is hard, my God is Great.
It seems so cliche and it seems like I live on cloud 9 but I promise you, joy is so eternal. With all of the stress I was under these last 2 weeks, I’m still finding joy in the smallest of moments. Looking at my daughter in her smiling face or sleeping next to my fiancé and telling each other “I love you” at the end of the day. These are the moments I legit live for. Let’s put our best foot forward. Tell our problems that our God is bigger than any problem. And pray with me as I reset and breathe it out. Let’s give the last December of this decade a mighty push. I am claiming victory, peace of mind, better habits, better finances, and a solid wedding plan in December 2019.